Super Furry Animals.

Sexual intercourse is a really f*cking popular hobby pastime.

It’s a very well known science-coated fact, that doing a sex on someone is rated well inside the top one in the massive list of great things to do.

But why in the name of ROUGH BUGGERY are there people out there irrelevantly leap-jumping around and dressing as f*cking animals in order to get their slippery kicks?

It’s come to my special scientific attention that there is an actual flavour of perverts known as “Furries”.

I think they’re somehow related to animal f*ckers, but instead of softly dicking herons and lovethumping harmless fat owls and things, they just dress as cartoon animals and then f*ck inside each other until the make-up runs.

Cartoon animals.

I’m not some kind of sexual retard, I know there is a f*cking world of f*cking out there. And I’m happy with that, I like the fact that our sweaty civilisation is full of dirty, dirty f*ckers and people who like to do things to each other.

God knows I’m a complete filthbox myself.

But that’s because he’s always watching.

Jesus. That’s going to be an awkward conversation.


The thing is, most sexual perversions are completely understandable, in the sense that you can see some semblance of normality bumming inside the awful perverted bumming. Right?

Take all the leather and chains and high heels, all that sh!t, at least it’s women wearing sex clothes to do the dirting. And that whole dogging thing, at least it’s just normal sex moves being done at each other inside a wet Ford Fiesta.

Even that thing when you get a lady to f*ckwalk across your actual you with her big high heels or something, well, at least you can probably sneak a look up her rubber chuff-tube and crack one off at the sight of her special wig-wam.

Or something.

But these Furries are completely f*cking off the f*cking radar.

I’d probably have more respect for them if they actually went out and f*cked a tiger into it’s striped anus, at least there is a degree of impressiveness in the concept of cornering and furiously buggering a giant cat in a dangerous jungle.

These people simply gather together looking like fat children’s cartoons.

They dress like complete f*cking c*nts and then f*ckpester each other pretending to be sexual cloth animals for twisted dirty thrills.

How is this even possible?

What kind of a perverted w@nkCRAYON gets their bulb off by angrily face-bumming a fat woman dressed as a f*cking hedgehog?

Or watching a penguin sucking your plums, or a giant pink mouse fingering a f*cking giraffe, or whatever else the horrendous sh!t they do is?

I ask you.